Rubí’s Tuesday Blogue is written by Rubí donkey. Today Rubí reflects on the new fad of eating out to save the economy. WARNING: this blogue contains irony. If you are a donkey psychologist in the USA with a famous donkey-whispering blogue but no sense of humour, please do not read. Follow Rubí’s example: she doesn’t read either.
We decided to eat out on Friday. Morris had been reading on the interweb that eating out was patriotic and it would save the hospitality industry. Everyone is doing it, he told us. We asked Morris, “What is the hospitality industry?”
“It’s restaurants, hotels, bars and that sort of thing,” he replied. “Everything you sit down in. Yes, Aitana it prolly includes public toilets as well. Yes, and park benches too. Let’s not get too bothered about the detail, eh?”
“So why is that an ‘industry’?” I asked. “Surely industry is making something. Manufacturing. So what does the hospitality industry make?”
Morris thought for a second or two. He had not considered this, but he responded with great authority after a pause: “They make hospitals! Hos-pit-ality. The clue is in the word.”
“Horse – pit – al – it – y,” repeated Aitana, slowly mouthing the components of the word. “Like the equine clinic in San Juan?”
“Right… and if we eat out,” said Matilde, “then we are helping to build hospitals?”
So we went to eat out on Friday evening, up the hill, beyond the Peasant’s house, in a cool shady spot under the pine trees. Since the Peasant no longer eats out on Friday evenings due to his fear of the Chinese pangolin-bat-plague, he was able to supervise our plan and install the necessary electric fencing. He came with us to help us choose from the menu. We mostly chose everything. Except trees, which the Peasant said were off the menu.
“So,” said Matilde, looking dubiously at a rough patch of dried grass, “can you just explain it again please? Why are we eating out in this rubbish patch exactly?”
“To build a horse clinic,” replied Aitana.
“No,” said Morris. “To be patriotic and support the economy,”
“And how does that work again?” asked Matilde.
Morris was uprooting a whole bunch of grass and vigorously shaking off the dry clay earth. “Keynesian economics,” he said. “We eat out – munching this different grass instead of eating straw at home – and we heroically save the national economy. Simples.”
But Matilde wasn’t listening. She had noticed the Peasant was in possession of beer, and that was 98% more interesting than Keynesian economics.
Later that evening, Matilde watched the half moon rising over the Castellets ridge. She wondered where the other half of the moon went. It was prolly eaten out by patriotic customers doing their bit for Keynesian economics. Humans and peasants are very complicated, she thought. But it was good that Morris could explain their silly ideas in such a clear way for simple equine minds.
Update nearly the end of Tuesday:
Morris has been reading the Interweb and he says we must add this news to the Rubí Tuesday blog before the day finishes. Joe Biden has chosen his running mate and it is Kamala Harris. I don’t know why this is important but Morris says it is world news. I think it is world news because Kamala Harris seems to like straw. She gets our vote.