The patriotic eating outs

Rubí’s Tuesday Blogue is written by Rubí donkey. Today Rubí reflects on the new fad of eating out to save the economy. WARNING: this blogue contains irony. If you are a donkey psychologist in the USA with a famous donkey-whispering blogue but no sense of humour, please do not read. Follow Rubí’s example: she doesn’t read either.

We decided to eat out on Friday. Morris had been reading on the interweb that eating out was patriotic and it would save the hospitality industry. Everyone is doing it, he told us. We asked Morris, “What is the hospitality industry?”

“It’s restaurants, hotels, bars and that sort of thing,” he replied. “Everything you sit down in. Yes, Aitana it prolly includes public toilets as well. Yes, and park benches too. Let’s not get too bothered about the detail, eh?”

“So why is that an ‘industry’?” I asked. “Surely industry is making something. Manufacturing. So what does the hospitality industry make?”

Morris thought for a second or two. He had not considered this, but he responded with great authority after a pause: “They make hospitals! Hos-pit-ality. The clue is in the word.”

Horse – pit – al – it – y,” repeated Aitana, slowly mouthing the components of the word. “Like the equine clinic in San Juan?”

Silly horse!

“Right… and if we eat out,” said Matilde, “then we are helping to build hospitals?”

“Exactly.”

So we went to eat out on Friday evening, up the hill, beyond the Peasant’s house, in a cool shady spot under the pine trees. Since the Peasant no longer eats out on Friday evenings due to his fear of the Chinese pangolin-bat-plague, he was able to supervise our plan and install the necessary electric fencing. He came with us to help us choose from the menu. We mostly chose everything. Except trees, which the Peasant said were off the menu.

“So,” said Matilde, looking dubiously at a rough patch of dried grass, “can you just explain it again please? Why are we eating out in this rubbish patch exactly?”

“To build a horse clinic,” replied Aitana.

“No,” said Morris. “To be patriotic and support the economy,”

“And how does that work again?” asked Matilde.

Morris was uprooting a whole bunch of grass and vigorously shaking off the dry clay earth. “Keynesian economics,” he said. “We eat out – munching this different grass instead of eating straw at home – and we heroically save the national economy. Simples.”

But Matilde wasn’t listening. She had noticed the Peasant was in possession of beer, and that was 98% more interesting than Keynesian economics.

Later that evening, Matilde watched the half moon rising over the Castellets ridge. She wondered where the other half of the moon went. It was prolly eaten out by patriotic customers doing their bit for Keynesian economics. Humans and peasants are very complicated, she thought. But it was good that Morris could explain their silly ideas in such a clear way for simple equine minds.

Update nearly the end of Tuesday:

Morris has been reading the Interweb and he says we must add this news to the Rubí Tuesday blog before the day finishes. Joe Biden has chosen his running mate and it is Kamala Harris. I don’t know why this is important but Morris says it is world news. I think it is world news because Kamala Harris seems to like straw. She gets our vote.

Kamala Harris straw poll.

9 thoughts on “The patriotic eating outs

  1. Glad to hear you all had a pleasant evening out. The restaurant looks lovely and I imagine the views were spectacular. I am reassured that trees were off the menu, as eating trees is not good for the eco-economy, Rubí, I’m afraid. Tell Matilde that pondering where the other side of the moon has dissapeared to is always best done after drinking the Peasant’s beer.

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  2. Yes Alys, I am sure Matilde managed to get some of the Peasant’s beer eventually. Since he mostly drinks the cheap beer in the one litre bottles, the last dregs in the bottle usually go flat in the fridge, so Matilde gets her small beer. It’s when the Peasant gets his occasional pack of Galicia that ‘Big Mummy Donk’ doesn’t get a look-in!

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  3. As aways whenever I need cheering up, I can read about Rubi, Morris, Matilde and Aitana. The peasant seems to be a really good guy!

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  4. Prolly the Peasant could improve a bit by feeding them their carrots as soon as they start braying at 7 o’clock. They have mentioned it but the service isn’t much better and sometimes they even wait till quarter past seven! Mea culpa…

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  5. Greetings Gareth from a parallel universe. I am a retired academic of Buddhist tendencies with four donkeys (and two horses) in the rural Algarve. I only planned for two but like yourself had a nice surprise and then had to balance the herd by getting number four to save a depressed foalless Jenny. I happened upon your site while searching images of donkey fencing after yet another breakout by the three year olds in search of my young trees. We’re faring better than you with COVID at the moment but leaving the farm is a bit of a shock when faced with the masked world. Stay well and keep blogging..

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  6. Hi, Robin. Good to see a new reader on the blog. If you came here via a search on donkey fencing I’m not sure if you found anything useful about that. (I think the articles about fencing were on my old brotherlapin blog several years ago.)

    If it would be useful I’ll post some details. I have a small number of trees on the two donkey terraces and they need careful management with electric fence (“pastor electrico”). When the donkeys break into the tree areas they do incredible damage, mostly to upper branches but also they can strip bark from the trunk (and that’s the end of the tree.) I’ve now posted details about the specs for the solar battery and pulse unit and a whole load of other points about fencing!

    https://equusasinus.net/2020/08/15/donkey-fencing/

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